Less is more

Less = MoreSo I just took the Craniosacral Therapy I course two weeks ago. I’m just now starting to put into words how powerful this work can be. Diane, who has been a therapist for us for 3 years, has done many of the advanced Craniosacral Courses, just quietly smiles as I continue to tell her how my mind has been blown over and over and over again.

For those that don’t know what Craniosacral is you should probably set up an appointment because it is the most profound, soul stirring, life changing work I’ve ever come across. Craniosacral Therapy is a light touch modality that works directly to calm and reset the nervous system.

What I took most from this course is how less can be so much more. Because bodywork is often a reflection of our own lives, I’ve been thinking about how the less is more concept can be applied to my own life. It has been profound and challenging to start to apply these principals in my own life.

There is the obvious thought of clutter, of stuff. My husband and I seriously downsized our “stuff” a couple of years ago and it was so liberating. We still have a lot to go… mostly books that I can’t bring myself to get rid of, but the initial downsizing of clutter freed up so much time for us the benefits were immediate.

What I’m realizing now is the deeper place of less is more in relationships.

The less I try and control. The less I try and manage. The less I try and fix. The more joy, abundance and freedom I have in my life and the more fulfilling, rich and satisfying my relationships are.

The less I try and control. The less I try and manage. The less I try and fix. The more joy, abundance and freedom I have in my life and the more fulfilling, rich and satisfying my relationships are.

I may or may not have an “I can do it all” mentality. What I am finding as I surrender to that “I have to do it all” (a.k.a. “I have to do MORE”) and do less, the people around me step up in really beautiful ways. By doing less the gifts of people around me get to show up in really big ways.  When we do less, we can have more community. When we do less, we can have more support. When we do less, we can actually have more.

By doing less the gifts of people around me get to show up in really big ways.

When I let go of my need to plan where I go to dinner or coffee with friends, I am surprised by these beautiful spaces and amazing meals that I would have never found on my own.

When I let go of my need to tell my husband exactly how I need something done, I am amazed by his creativity and I feel his love for me expressed in a greater way because whatever it was that he did, was all him. He’ll do what I ask him to do, but I essentially  miss out on more love because he is doing it my way.

Doing less can feel really vulnerable. Basically, by doing less, you are asking for support, you are asking for others to show up. But you know what I’m learning…they do. Not only do they show up, but by asking for support, you get so much more than you could ever do, accomplish or create on your own.

Doing less doesn’t mean throwing in the towel, sitting down and letting everyone else around you do things for you. Doing less just means you don’t have to do it all. Doing less means you can get support in the areas that you need it so you can give more of your time and energy to the things you really love. The things you’re really good at. And others get to do the same.

Here are some ways that I’ve been doing less to hopefully inspire you to do less and see how much more joy, abundance and freedom you can get out of your life.

  • Asked the massage therapists that work with me to do a couple loads of laundry a week. To my surprise they were happy to and now I’m not at the laundromat at 9:00 every Friday night.
  • I leave my dog at a friends house to play for a couple of hours every week. Feels totally indulgent to have some free time (I don’t have kids, so he’s my four-legged kiddo). Her dog loves it and my dog gets a good play in, is super happy and a very tired pup when I pick him up.
  • Told my husband he needs to make his own appointments from now on. I don’t keep track of them or remind him of them. Opens up a lot of space in my brain to focus on things that are WAY more fun. If he misses an appointment, oh well, it’s on him.

You get the picture. Start by looking at the areas of your life that feel like too much. If you are like me, at first it will seem impossible to create space around these areas. To be honest, I was terrified to ask my therapists to do two sets of massage sheets a week. I was convinced they’d all leave, tell me how lazy I was and spread nasty rumors about what a bad business owner I was. Guess what? None of it happened.

The thing is, the less = more thing only works if it’s a win/win. Like leaving my dog with a friend. It only works b/c her dog gets so much out of it and she gets a tired puppy too. As far as the win/win asking my husband to make his own appointments. He has become more aware of his body, he knows when he needs to see the physical therapist, he knows when he needs acupuncture. Through this awareness, he is more aware of his needs and how his body feels. As a result he is more connected, grounded, present. A huge win/win.

Take a minute right now and list 5 areas that you could do a little less. You don’t have to know what the answers are or how you’re going to get more out of those experiences. Just acknowledge where you need a little less in your life so you can get more out of your life.